Sunday, August 8, 2010

Life Changes

So life goes on at a mad pace, and it brings changes all the time.  Sometimes they are so small, we almost miss them.  Other times, they are HUGE.

My family is facing a HUGE change right now - the patriarch of our family is not doing well.  It seemed like it came on very suddenly, a change in his medicine, and he became confused and could no longer walk steadily.  In fact, he could hardly stand without falling over.  My son Gage was staying with my parents while he worked in Dallas this summer, and he and my mom called my brother in law Jeff, and they took dad to the hospital.  He didn't get a lot better there, in fact, at times it seemed like he was getting worse.  The doctors couldn't seem to understand what was going on, in fact, one in particular wanted to argue with my mother that what she knew wasn't so.   If there is one thing that's been brought home to me throughout this, something I guess I already knew, but has become obvious to everyone - there is no use arguing with my mother, because she's just right, and she knows what she's talking about, especially when it comes to dad.

Dad was released to a rehab, where mom kept telling them she thought he had a urinary track infection.  Once again, she was dismissed as not knowing what she was talking about, until blood showed in his urine, and once again, he was whisked to the hospital.  And tests showed he had a urinary track infection.
At that point, my mother decided dad would be better off at home rather than going back to the rehab center.  So last Tuesday, a month after he left for the hospital, he came back home.

We are trying to keep him there.  He seems to be doing so much better at home, although he is not well yet.  But he has progressed from a wheelchair to a walker, which is another HUGE thing.  He has more moments where he isn't confused.
My sisters and I and some of my children are taking turns staying there with mom and dad.  It's hard on my mom, who is very tiny, and she needs help especially with the physical part of caring for dad.  Plus, dad doesn't always sleep well at night, and sometimes she just needs a break to get a full nights sleep.
I had my turn sitting up with dad this past week.  There is something very different about "parenting" your parent - trying to tell him he can't get up, that he needs to go to sleep...I spent a lot of time that night just looking at him and thinking back on how strong he used to be.

Well, dad will get better, I hope, to the point where we can all relax again.  Then, I can stop and ponder all this.  But for now, our family is all pulling together to take care of dad, and that's what families are for, aren't they?


  1. What a beautiful picture, Carla.
    I read with tears in my eyes. Howard's father's last days are still so fresh on our hearts. It is all a sobering reminder that we are all "going down the valley, one by one".
    My prayers for you and your loved ones, especially your Dad.

  2. What a beautiful picture this is, Carla. I am so sorry about your father. I will be praying for your family. How wonderful that you and your children are able to be there to help. You have, indeed, raised wonderful blessings. YOU are a blessing. Love always, Lori S.

  3. So glad you posted this Carla. Please tell your mom and dad they are in my thoughts and prayers. It is wonderful you and your children can help. Your family is in my prayers, too. My love to you all.
    Pam Speed


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